Saturday, June 11, 2011

being assertive, making peace and being grateful about it

There are a few parts to this story.
The first part
I am taking a course at the moment for some professional development and personal development too I guess. When the course started we had to set a few goals about what we wanted to achieve during the course. One of mine was being assertive in my work and the people I work with (and in my personal life too, but the course is more about your work) and being able to say no to things I don't actually want to do, I've been bad at this in the past, but I feel like I have been making some good progress with this one. And I feel positive about it.
The second part
I saw something on facebook that really annoyed and offended me. So I let the person know. I didn't comment on the status but sent them a text and didn't hear back. I left it for a while and then called them. And they were pretty cold. I sort of let rip about how I felt and that I thought they should think about what they put on facebook, that they don't need to put everything that comes into their mind on facebook. They let rip back about always been given a hard time about what they put on facebook. They ended up crying and this was sad crying, like what I had said had uncovered some deep hurt they were holding in and this was the last straw. I felt sick to my stomach that I had made them cry.
The third part.
We decided after we had had it out that we would catch up this morning. Have some special time today. It was really good. We made peace.
I felt like I expressed how I felt, but then when I was thinking about it later I probably got a bit passionate and aggressive and was a bit hard on them.
It was important to make peace because this person was my sister.
So I am grateful for asserting myself and making peace.
For more gratefuls pop over to this lovely blog, you'll love it!


  1. Wow, I think both you and your sister think each other is entirely worth it. That is gorgeous.

  2. a lovely story. Glad it all worked out.

  3. I have a tense relationship with my sister and can understand how difficult it can be to speak up.
    Kudo's to you for doing so!

  4. ooh family- so so hard but such a deep love there. im glad you are at peace. an new beginning unburdened by the past.

    xo em

  5. So glad you made peace with your sister, but its also important that you told her how you felt. Good on you!
    Enjoy the long weekend! x

  6. I'm glad you made peace with your sister, I think its important to be able to tell the people you love how you feel even if it upsets them but its more important to make sure you get past it too!
    Well done though, these kinds of things are never easy! x

  7. a great little story within this post - probably a very significant thing that has happened for both you. Good on you for speaking your mind - it is so much harder than it sounds, telling others when they have upset you without getting over emotional and worked up about it. It's definitely a fine line to walk. Gill xo

  8. Oh Facebook - so many unnecessary things are said. Glad you made peace x

  9. Learning to speak up for yourself will come with a few bumps in the road but it sounds like you have indeed smoothed things out with your sister in the end - Good for you!

    And I agree with Jodi - so many (WAY too many!) unnecessary things posted on Facebook =-\ SHEESH!

  10. Lauren, family relationships can be rather 'delicate'. I read your post with dread, however, then with joy to hear all is well with you and your sister once again. Unfortunately for me, I feel the wheels well and truly have fallen off. All I can do is love her from a distance and there isn't a day goes by that I wish I had shut my mouth instead of answering the question that was directed to me. I was brought up to be honest, seems it doesn't always pay. As for facebook, lol, oh yes, it can be so very hurtful. Thinking of you.


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