Thursday, July 11, 2013

time

I had one of those days today where I just didn't know what to do with myself. 
I thought many times about doing something I enjoyed, sewing, knitting, going for a walk...but just couldn't get the motivation up to do anything but a load of washing and watch some TV I'd missed during the week. When I did finally get the motivation to do something I baked a cake. A recipe I have used a number of times. For some reason the consistency was different and I couldn't figure out why, I had added all the ingredients. I decided to just leave it as it was and put it in the oven. It took ages to set and I ended up getting it out a bit earlier then I though I should. It was only when I took the cake out of the oven I realised I had put double the amount of butter...250grams instead of 125grams...bummer.
I find I'm pretty hard on myself on these sorts of days, feeling like I should(could?)be getting things done. This usually happens after a few "good" days. We had a really nice weekend. One of my sisters (and her husband) came to stay with us. It was really nice to have them here. Jek and I spent some time moving some things around in the house. My crafty space is in another area of our house now and it works so well, I have found myself going into the space a number of times just to sit and enjoy the space. It's off of our kitchen and I can see into the space when I am at the sink. In time I think I am going to enjoy creating in that space.
After Jek and Dave left we started painting our entryway and hallway so that distracted me from them leaving. It took us a couple of days. One for the undercoat and one to paint. It looks so good now. It was a dark green and it made the hall so dark. It is now antique white and it is so different and great. We are looking forward to doing a few of the other rooms too, now that we know what we are doing.
Yesterday I went and had a facial, manicure and pedicure. It was a gift from 3 of my dear friends. It was so lovely and relaxing. I am finding it more and more important to set a few tasks each day, so I'm not at a loose end...being at a loose end doesn't feel very nice at the moment.
Getting back to today...something very nice happened, Tim bought me a beautiful bunch of bright flowers. orange Gerberas, yellow daisies, red roses and a flower I don't know but it is bright and happy. He got them just because. He's so wonderful to me.

My sister in law pinned this photo a couple of days ago and I thought it to be so true and quite comforting, that it is OK that our healing takes time and I don't have to rush. Even when I am having a not so good day and the motivation is lacking, it's all part of my healing process
xx

3 comments:

  1. I think doing some washing, watching some tv and baking a buttery cake sound like great achievements. You should be pleased with yourself, truly. Glad to hear Tim is looking after you, as I'm sure you are him. God bless you, Chelse

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  2. That photo is lovely, and true. Give yourself the time you need to heal, those listless days are absolutely part of the process too. Thinking of you. Belinda x

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